My Dad Wrote A Porno

Regular price $15.99

What would you do if your dad wrote an erotic novel? Jamie Morton’s answer was to share his dad’s tale of sexual adventure, Belinda Blinked 1, with the world. He embarked on a life-changing literary journey with his two best mates, creating the hilarious, filthy number one podcast phenomenon My Dad Wrote a Porno.

Belinda blinked, it wasn’t a dream, the job interviewer had just asked her to remove her jacket and silk blouse…

Now, for the first time you can own the full text of Rocky Flintstone’s seminal masterpiece Belinda Blinked 1, along with James, Jamie, and Alice’s baffled, delighted, and disgusted commentary. My Dad Wrote a Porno is packed full of bonus material, from the official drinking game rules to Rocky’s exclusive insights into his erotic exposé of the pots and pans industry. You’ll never look at a pomegranate the same way again…

Shipping

Shipping is $7 flat. No international shipping at this time. Free shipping over $100. Standard Shipping are estimated to arrive within 7-10 business days(excluding holidays and weekends). 

Greeting Cards is $2 flat. Use discount code (greeting cards) at checkout.

Returns/Exchanges


Our policy lasts 14 days upon confirmation of delivery. If 14 days have gone by since your purchase, unfortunately we can’t offer you a refund or exchange.

To be eligible for a return, your item must be unused and in the same condition that you received it with ALL tags attached. You must contact us first at info@mercenarygeneral.com for approval of return item. Any items returned to us without approval will not be accepted and the package will be returned back to sender.

Several types of goods are exempt from being returned. Refunds are available on all items except for jewelry, books, lingerie, swimwear, holiday items and sale items. No exceptions.

Additional non-returnable items:
Gift cards
Downloadable software products
Health and personal care items

To complete your return, we require a receipt or proof of purchase.

Refunds (if applicable)
Once your return is received and inspected, we will send you an email to notify you that we have received your returned item. We will also notify you of the approval or rejection of your refund.
If you are approved, then your refund will be processed, and a credit will automatically be applied to your credit card or original method of payment, less shipping costs.

Late or missing refunds (if applicable)
If you haven’t received a refund yet, first check your bank account again.
Then contact your credit card company, it may take some time before your refund is officially posted.
Next contact your bank. There is often some processing time before a refund is posted.
If you’ve done all of this and you still have not received your refund yet, please contact us at info@mercenarygeneral.com.

Sale items (if applicable)
Only regular priced items may be refunded, unfortunately sale items cannot be refunded.

Exchanges (if applicable)
We only replace items if they are defective or damaged. If you need to exchange it for the same item, send us an email at info@mercenarygeneral.com and send your item to: 120 Broadway Santa Monica California US 90401.


Shipping
To return your product, you should mail your product to: 120 Broadway Santa Monica California US 90401

You will be responsible for paying for your own shipping costs for returning your item. Shipping costs are non-refundable. If you receive a refund, the cost of return shipping will be deducted from your refund.

Depending on where you live, the time it may take for your exchanged product to reach you, may vary.

If you are shipping an item over $75, you should consider using a trackable shipping service or purchasing shipping insurance. We don’t guarantee that we will receive your returned item.